| | I remember hearing several people saying when I was younger that time is man's greatest teacher. Though I have thought about it several times, I really cannot say it has been a statement I have really understood. Even now, I am not entirely sure if I understand it, however the combination of time, age, maturity, and level of responsibility has had its effect on me. Perhaps some would call what I have been going through over the past three to four months a quarter-life crisis, while others would say they are a common part of becoming an adult. Personally I feel it is a time when one finally comfortable with their own skin but does not want to wear it. Regardless, there is about the change-something that is never easy, however one does get better about reacting to it.
From a professional standpoint things have been going amazingly well for me. A program that was stagnant is now beginning to gain attention around the county, they were the only middle school band to participate in the Lumberton Christmas Parade, parents and faculty have both agreed the Winter Concert it was the most prepared and organized it has been in years, and the level of student performance is increasing exponentially. The parents have been been fantastic as well through the work they do through the band booster organization. In addition this will be the school's first year participating on concert contest as well as having a record number of people participate in district band auditions in two weeks. As odd as it may sound, I cannot help but feel like a 'proud papa'.
While enjoying success in one are of my life has been great, there are other areas of my life that need to be brought into balance. The kicker is I cannot do it by myself. Two weeks ago in a sermon my pastor said the following: it is easy to love people from a distance, however it is much more difficult to love them when they are right next to you. When I heard this devastating reality my heart sank first to pity, then to forgiveness. With the exception of a couple, I have to face the reality I have been terrible with most of the relationships in my life. It is hard to having a meaningful relationships with your ego standing in the way. Something else I have found it that it is difficult to have true joy when you see this in yourself, more importantly it has spiritual ramifications as it places a higher priority on self than God. When creature is given higher priority than creator failure is inevitable.
So whats next? The answer is I really don't know. There is no plan, in fact I believe it is to be avoided. You do not live your are dying by planning your own funeral, instead one has to embrace every opportunity that has been afforded to them with open arms. Building relationships is about the process. Savor each moment for its worth; taste its bitterness or sweetness. Just like a healthy diet is not always the one that taste the best, it is the most rewarding. May these rewards only be secondary to the treasures found in God, especially through what He has spoken through His Word.
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| | Posted 1/13/2008 11:23 PM - 8 Views - 0 eProps - 0 comments
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